Abled when disabled?!

Dec 29, 2022
4 min read

Updated: Jan 13

Have you ever thought about how words can be powerful tools?

The use of language and choice of words can empower and disempower an individual because it conveys a message.

Some words or definitions connote a person’s potential while others imply a sense of dependency and inferiority.

Some words can engage you, discourage you, guide you, move you, motivate you, trigger you, uplift you, …

At 8 years old, as I was writing my first poem, I remember getting fascinated with words! I was attracted to understanding their meanings and to finding their synonyms! This source of enthrallment opened a venue for expressing emotions and thoughts : expressive writing.

You have to decide who you want to become

As I was getting into my teens, a period when we usually search for a sense of self and personal identity, through exploration of personal values, beliefs, and goals, I was faced with a decision I had to take. At that moment, I knew I had to decide who I would like to become.

Even if I was just in the beginning of my teens, I had one thing on my plate that pushed me to reflect, to think about and to deal with : I had and have a rare syndrome called Klippel-Trenaunay.

Klippel-Trenaunay syndrome, also called KTS, is a rare disorder found at birth (congenital) involving problems in the development of certain blood vessels, the skin, the muscles and the bones. KTS usually affects one leg but it may occur in an arm or elsewhere. In my case it’s my leg and lower abdomen.

KTS comes with different physical and psychological challenges.

Physically, one has to deal with the limitations it can cause and the pain it incurs. Pain with the nerves, the muscles and the blood vessels.

Psychologically concerns the esthetics. Esthetically, one has to deal with the beauty of red and purple bubbly birthmarks ( at home, we call them grapes thanks to my friend Pat who popped that nickname when we were in elementary school), with the exceptionality of atypical veins (we call them the oversized spaghettis), and the extraordinariness of an overgrowth of skin and bones (my kids named it a bionic weapon and I named it the elephant leg!).

Grappling, as a teen, with the physical and emotional challenges, I had to make a decision that will either shape my identity positively or negatively.

The journey I chose to follow, and I am presently pursuing is based on the decision made and the that words that were chosen : “make the best of what you have, set and reach your goals by finding the means you will implement to reach them!”.

Focus on what you can do and not on what you can't do!

In other words, it first meant making a plan by setting goals. Second, it meant focus on what you could do rather than looking at what you can’t do to finally figure out the way to get there.

As I immersed myself in trying to reach the summit of this mountain I challenged myself to climb and reach, I've noticed that there were times when I did not bother to look on either side of the mountain, and times when I did peer at the impediments and the odds I was trying to resist.

I’ve discovered that this has been and is an ongoing learning and enriching journey towards self-awareness, self-discovery and self-development.

This is what “abled when disabled” is all about.

You see, according to the Cambridge dictionary the word abled means not having a disability, not having an illness, an injury, or condition that makes it difficult for someone to do some things that other people do. And, the word disabled means lacking one or more of the physical or mental abilities that most people have.

But, when you look at the etymology of abled and disabled, you notice that these two words hold more positivity and bear hope :

"abled" is about having the means to reach your goals!

Abled comes from the word able ‘’having sufficient power or means," from Old French “able” "capable; fitting, suitable; agile, nimble".

Disabled referred to "incapacitated." Earlier it meant "legally disqualified".

In other words, abled corresponds to having the means to act, to create, to do, to implement, to make decisions, to execute, to perform, etc. As for the concept “means”, it stands for the actions, the methods, the resources, the strategies, the tools, the techniques etc. one applies, employs, implements, or uses to achieve something or get something done.

On the other hand, the notion disabled designates to cause someone or something to not be able to work or live normally. I can associate it, in some way, to the term handicap, because they both do not represent an individual’s personal deficit or shortcoming. Handicap was the name of a game called ‘hand in cap” and was originally used when someone would hang stones on a horse, who was much quicker than the other horses, to slow him down to equalize the chances of winning. Interesting, how both words, disabled and handicap, did not depict characteristics intrinsic to mankind, but rather indicated more of extrinsic barriers.

So, …? You might be asking yourself! As Glenda Watson Hyatt questioned “it doesn’t really matter what term is used, does it? After all, is not a rose by any other name still a rose?”

True, on one hand ; the label you will use to call or refer to something does not change the identity of that object or that person, nor does it define it.

But as I said earlier, some words or definitions connote a person’s potential while others imply a sense of dependency and inferiority. Some words can engage you, discourage you, guide you, move you, motivate you, trigger you, uplift you, …

So this writing adventure, *Abled when Disabled, is not about KTS, it's about what I've learned, it's about focusing on abled rather than disabled, no matter what is causing one to be disabled. it’s about keeping your mind on what you can do rather than what you can’t do, it’s about self-development, …

Have you ever thought about how words can empower or disempower you, and, how they are connected to your personal or professional self-development plan?